It's the beginning of the end

I am in total, complete count down mode. I know this would upset Dr. Strait because he'd tell me I'm wishing away time, but still. I have 5 school days left of student teaching, 10 days til graduation, today is my Gate 4 interview, my portfolio is finished, and I'm getting married in 2 months. And as exciting and awesome as all this is, I have an ever growing ball of anxiety threatening to eat me alive.
I DON'T HAVE A JOB nor do I have an interview. I've applied at multiple schools, my classmates are getting interviews, the time frame is running out, and all I've gotten are polite emails saying they're considering all their options. Heck, I didn't even get an email back from the school I really want to work at in spite of the 24 hour mandatory response period at Fayette County.
I'm beginning to wonder if I'm doing anything right at all. People keep telling me (especially my classmates who are being interviewed) that "He has a plan for me" and "He will get me through this on His power." As much as I hate to say it, He needs to hurry up. I know that's rude and I shouldn't get upset with God about this, but if there's some master plan for my life, I'd love to know at least a small part of it now. I know I'm meant to go to Haiti...some time, but until then what do I do with my life? I've spent four years on a teaching degree only to find out that no one wants English teachers and they're not too happy with ESL teachers either, despite telling me that it's a "shortage" area. I'm going crazy here. Add that to the never ending demands that come with student teaching, trying to get any details in order for my wedding, finishing my registry, finding a job after graduation...I'm gonna drop dead from stress at this point. Poor Dave, he's putting up with so much crazy right now.

April

I have 16 school days left of student teaching. At least 2 of those (potentially 4) are taken up with KCCT testing and the last 5 are kind of unofficial since I'll have done all my Gate stuff by then. I currently have a DVD of me teaching due next week and all my portfolio stuff is due on the 23rd by midnight. Then I'll have a stressful sort of interview on the 27th and then student teaching is basically over. It's such a strange feeling. I really don't feel like I've been here that long, nor do I feel like I should be this old.
In addition to student teaching/college wrapping up (an idea I still can't get my head around) my wedding is coming up...rather quickly. I'm really, really, really enjoying the fact that my reception is in a barn. It makes everything awesome for some reason. It's totally dictated the mood and my mental image of the whole thing. It's like knowing that this barn is there, I suddenly get a picture of how everything else needs to be, like invitations, food, decorations, and music. As much as I've wanted to run away and get married, I'm almost enjoying planning everything out and mentally nesting my future home. No one is allowed to tell Dave this. It's just our little secret...unless Dave gets on here and reads it himself, then the secret is out.
On the job front...there isn't one yet. I just finished my application to Scott County this morning, sent in a substitute application for Franklin Co. yesterday, applied to Clark Co. a couple months ago, and applied for two positions in Fayette Co. a while back as well. So, thus far that's 4 teaching applications and 1 application for a job period. I've got another one for a private Christian school in Lawrenceburg that I'll work on today. *sigh* Now Jefferson Co., if I could move there, has 19 high school English positions open and just about as many ESL jobs. Unfortunately, I'm tethered here for now. I just need a job, period, and I'm starting to panic a little, just one of those in-the-back-of-my-mind panics. Hopefully schools start posting jobs soon.